How to read cues know someone is trying to tell you something

How to read cues know someone is trying to tell you somethingHow to read cues know someone is trying to tell you somethingIt would be less confusing to live in a world where we always mean what we say. But as a general rule, most people hate conflict, so they would rather drop hints and clues couched in softer language before they resort to direct dissent. Its an understandable defense mechanism in the workplace. No one enjoys being a downer with bad berichterstattung for their boss.But by learning how to read a room and pick up on cues that people are trying to give you, you can avoid being blindsided. Before you get verbal confirmation of important news, there will be body language tells and word choices that are foreshadowing layoffs, hirings, and firings to come.Here are tips on how to understand subtext in the office and look underneath the underneath.Body languageYou need to pay attention to what is not said just as much as whats said. If someone is strangely silent on a subj ect, their reticence may be a clue that somethings weighing on their mind. You can broach this silence by asking an open-ended question like, What do you think? to see what the other persons not saying.How people deliver information to you will also be revealing. Drumming fingers, fidgeting in seats, and looking at phones indicates nerves, impatience, boredom, or at their worst, that the person is not fully present in their job.Eye contact is one of the easiest tells to read. When someone looks you in the eye, it indicates confidence, authority, and presence. Their attention is fully on you. When you dont get eye contact, its nonverbal feedback that somethings up. When someone is looking at the ground instead of at you, that suggests insecurity. In extreme cases, your colleagues may be physically avoiding you because of impending bad news like layoffs.When things are going well, we should look in sync with our conversation partners. When they nod, you nod. When they uh-huh, you dont veer off and go ah-ah. As body language Patti Wood told Business Insider, It might look like youre dancing with the other person. If you dont dance with your teammates it can make you look youre not interested in what they are saying, you are not a good team player, or, in the extreme cases, that you are lying.RepetitionListen for repetition in reports. If an employee keeps saying something again and again, its not because theyre obsessing over a topic, its because they think youre not listening. If your boss keeps mentioning certain words around you, its to draw your attention to what they think youre not doing. Watch out for these and youll find navigation much easier.Oh, and by the way, recognizing the repetition isnt enough you should feel some interest in creating a solution for it. When things are repeated, they are usually significant problems. Learn to be part of the solution for them.Warning-word cluesListen for warning-word clues. There are words that deserve special atte ntion. Frustrated, disappointed, and uncomfortable are words that suggest far more negativity than they say.If someone says that theyre frustrated, for instance, it doesnt indicate theyre annoyed it usually means that they are near the end of their rope or thinking about quitting.Similarly, if your boss tell you theyre disappointed in your performance, it doesnt mean theyre sad. It means that firing you has crossed their mind. At the very least, it means theyve judged that you cant get results and you wont be getting big projects any time soon.And if an employee tells you that a colleague makes them uncomfortable, take this admission very seriously. It indicates much more than discomfort it indicates feeling an actual threat.But on the other hand, there are positive words that hint at good news. If a job interviewer says more than just well be in touch, that signals you have more than a chance.The lifelong job with these context clues is to learn to hear what people arent saying, so that you can become an expert interpreter of your colleagues and bosses intentions.Push to understand moreWith these observations, you can become smarter. But its also important not to assume youre always right. Theres always a potential variance in behavior.How do you know whats going on?First, verify what you think youre hearing. You can literally repeat it back to the person You said youre disappointed. If I understand correctly, that means you wanted things to go a very different way. What was the outcome you wanted?Second, participate in the solution I am hearing that youre frustrated. What specific things could we do to potentially change that?Third, keep your ear to the ground. Dont start any gossip, but you can verify with colleagues whether your observations hold water Have you noticed that Bill is behaving differently? What have you seen?The more information you can get, the more able you are to make informed decisions about your career.